Humor, wisdom, and philosophy in short takes:
It’s funny. When one is about ready to live, life’s about over. ...
A man told me he is going crazy and asked me how to live with it. “Don’t worry,” I told him. “Just look at all those so-called normal people, and you can’t do much worse.”
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Don’t dislike anyone. Some people like to be disliked.
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“Enjoyed your stuff last week,” a man told me. “Thanks,” I replied. “A little fantasy goes a long way sometimes.”
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I have a bird dog. I can cover more ground in a fast walk than that dog. He went on point the other day and it took two chiropractors and 20 teakettles of hot water for him to move again.
When Lake McLeansboro freezes over, it should take him about 10 years to skate across it.
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Some people living today think they will never die because they are too important.
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I hear people say they’d like to live the good old days again. Consider it. First of all, make a few trips to Mt. Vernon in a buggy. Prepare to lose part of your children to an early death. My grandmother lost five kids in less than two months. Go and plant a hundred acres with a team of horses. Spend a whole week cutting your firewood. How would you like to ‘put up’ with the old method or feed a thrasher for a week? How would you like to walk 20 miles to play a ball game? Don’t forget about scrubbing the clothes all day on a washboard. It’s only a few miles to walk to school and a few miles to walk back. Would you let your child walk that far today? We’d be tougher if we went back to the old days, but would you really trade your easier life and conveniences. The only thing good about the good old days was some of the good old people.
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